On Life: Blowing My Trumpet

I've been tagged (and nagged) by Aloted so I came to update my blog. It was well overdue! Honestly, I've had the urge to blog several times, but I can't seem to find enough hours in the day. And every little creative spark I have at the moment is going towards my professional writing. But anyway, back to the post:

Aloted and NoLimit came up with this idea for us to reflect and think about ten really positive attributes about us. (Here's the link to Aloted's post - here). I thought it was a great idea as Aloted mentioned, somehow we find it easy to remember the negative aspects of our character and we ignore the positives. So this got me thinking... and it was slow at first, but soon I was able to come up with more than ten good things about me.

So here goes:

Adaptable: I find that I can adjust to situations easily. Sometimes the fear of the unknown gets me worried, but once I'm in a situation, I can adjust and adapt easily.

Generous: I'm able to give and share easily. If I have something and someone else is in need, I will give. I actually find it enjoyable to give because I like it when the recipient is happy.  Sharing my stuff comes easy to me too.

Dedicated: I don't commit to things easily, but once I do, there's no going back. I will make sure I see it through to the end. Whether it's a relationship, a project, an idea, etc.

Creative: Of course. I have to be, I was created by an awesomely creative God, lol. I find that the more I express my creativity, the more I get creative ideas. Whether it's in writing, cooking, interior design, problem-solving, or other things, I enjoy coming up with something new and different.

Curious: Not about gossip or other people's business, lol. I have a thirst for life and knowledge. I love to read, to travel, to explore, to experience new things. I love to ask questions about the big issues in life.

Optimistic: I like to see things in a positive light. I function better when I'm positive about the outcomes of any task. I'm drawn towards happy, good, positive things. I like to dream big and hope for the best all the time. I can't stand negativity, it drags me down.

Loyal: I just am. I haven't got many friends, but I am very loyal to the ones I have. I don't think it's fair to betray anyone, much less someone that considers you a friend.

Thoughtful: I consider all angles before I speak or act. I don't like to feel that I acted rashly or unfairly towards anyone, so I go out of my way to avoid that. If it was unavoidable or unintentional, I always apologise.

Team-Player: I can work very well in a team. I like to share tasks, do my part and make sure that everyone else is doing their part too. I will happily offer to help out other members so that the whole team achieves its goals.

Gentle: I'm usually calm and gentle, not a lot stresses me out. I don't like aggression or drama so I stay well away from it. I like my peace of mind too much to go looking for trouble.

There we are! I really enjoyed doing this, actually. I should recall this post from time to time, when I'm tempted to beat myself up.

So to share this, I would like to tag:  Doll, Jaycee, Lara Daniels, Just Doyin, Believer, Vera, Simeone, Yellow Sisi, Shorty, Just Joxy, Enybee, Jhazmyn, ... okay, EVERYONE who has commented on my blog this year!

Stay blessed and favoured!

FG

Short Story - Aftermath

"Honey, let’s call your parents."

I looked into his eyes and smiled at my husband of forty-five hours. "No, not yet."

“Why not?”

“They will surely kill me this time."

“No point delaying the inevitable,” he laughed. "I'm sure they already know their daughter is one crazy chick."

I pulled myself up from my beach towel. “It might have occurred to them that I’m not like my siblings, but I don’t think my mother ever imagined that I would pull a stunt like this.”

“Eloping? That was the best thing I’ve ever done,” he said, running his fingers down my arm.

“Same here. But I’ve deprived my mother of a chance to shine and wear aso-ebi with her friends so she will never forgive me.”

Article - Dating in the Workplace

Article Published on ReConnect Africa

Relationships in the workplace are becoming more and more common in our modern society. The majority of professionals, once they graduate from formal education, spend the bulk of their time at the office. We build a career with other people for years and maybe even decades..... Click here to continue reading.....

On Life: Sober Thought

Life is funny. When you're at the top of one stage, you're at the bottom of another.

Interview with Dolapo Babalola

Hi people! Welcome to 2011, and to a new year of possibilities and opportunities. I've been busy working on a project behind the scenes since last year, but I'll keep you posted. In the meantime, enjoy my first post this year, an interview with Dolapo Babalola, author of the inspirational book: My God Even In the Last Minute.


Please tell us a bit about yourself.
Please if I may, I would first like to thank you for this great opportunity to reach your readers. Well, a few words about myself. I humbly say that I’m a God fearing Nigerian woman, blessed to be a wife, mother, family physician, sibling, and recently a debut author of an inspirational book titled: My God: Even in the Last Minute (MyGelm) released September 2010.
I am adventurous and hate to turn down a challenge, unless for a good cause. I enjoy spending time with family, dancing, writing, listening to music, and being inspired to reach higher grounds.

Financial Woes - Short Story

I've got a short story published in the fourth edition of Sentinel Nigeria Magazine.

Click here to read it! Financial Woes - by Tolulope Popoola

Comments welcome, thanks!

Poem - Ideal World

A world without suffering.

A world without pain.

A world without guilt.

A world without war.

A world without hunger.

This would be my ideal world.

A world without greed.

A world without selfishness.

A world without fear.

A world without hate.

A world without strife.

This would be my ideal world.

A world without crime.

A world without tears.

A world without sorrow.

A world without disappointment.

A world without sickness.

A world without prejudice.

This would be my ideal world.

A world without jealousy.

A world without divorce.

A world without lust.

A world without poverty.

A world without unforgiveness.

This would be my ideal world.

A world without famine.

A world without drought.

A world without conflict.

A world without division.

A world without disasters.

This would be my ideal world.

A world with peace.

A world with love.

A world with joy.

A world with laughter.

A world with honesty.

A world with acceptance.

A world with forgiveness.

This would be my ideal world.

(c) Tolulope Popoola

(Oh and one more thing. A world without taxes would be my ideal world!)

Book Review - Love at Dawn

Book Title: Love at Dawn
Author: Lara Daniels
Publication Date: November 2010
Pages: 205 pages

The Plot: ‘Love at Dawn’ is the second in a series of romance novels written by Lara Daniels. It tells the story of two people from very different backgrounds – the rich, spoiled, baby of the family - Tory Da-Silva and Rashad Macaulay, an emotionally insecure man who has come from a tough background and tried to work his way to the top. The two of them are intertwined with a host of other interesting characters and a dangerous stalker, who is intent on destroying Tory because of a dark secret she has never told anyone. The story is set in a fictional beautiful African city of Laketown in eastern Zamzudan. The city of Laketown is nestled among beautiful hills and caves. This setting is where Tory grew up, among her family of warm, caring people who doted on her. Rashad on the other hand, grew up in the village with his grandmother until he was nine, and then moved to a ghetto surburb called Gutterpark where he grew up among thugs and prostitutes until he managed to escape thanks to a scholarship.

Lara Daniels has woven a compelling story of love against all odds. From Tory and Rashad’s unconventional first meeting many years ago, to their complex present lives, and the way their relationship develops, she takes you through an emotional rollercoaster. There is a tight mix of suspense and intrigue to keep you fascinated and hoping against hope that the characters scale through all the roadblocks on their path to happiness.

As a character, Tory comes across as a likeable, carefree young girl, but when she meets Rashad, her older brother’s friend, he turns her world upside down and she becomes obsessed with him. Rashad, on the other hand, does not see himself as worthy of her and he does everything he can to resist her advances. He has a deep-rooted hatred of himself, and this is one of the main stumbling blocks in their relationship. The other thing is his close friendship with Tony Da Silva – Tory’s overprotective older brother. Rashad knew that there was no way Tony would approve of a relationship between him and his baby sister.

I enjoyed reading the book and I kept rooting for the characters till the very end. Lara’s writing is simple and it flows smoothly and this helps the story unfold without interruptions. The plot is full of twists and surprises that kept me on my toes, especially towards the end when a maniac serial killer comes on to the scene and Tory is suspected to be his next target. I hoped and prayed that the dark secrets the two main characters had been keeping for so long would be unlocked and all sins forgiven. I desperately wanted to get to “happily-ever-after” at the end and heave a sigh of relief.

I have very little criticism of the book – except maybe I wanted the story to go on for longer! I was a little concerned about the age gap between the two protagonists and Tory's age when she started falling for Rashad, but that may just be my personal prejudice. All in all, ‘Love at Dawn’ is a great book, and I will recommend it to everyone who enjoys reading a fresh take on modern African romance.


Rating: 4 out of 5
Where to buy: Amazon US  or Amazon UK 
Lara Daniels: http://laradaniels.com/ and http://laradanielswrites.com/

Article - Need to Compare?

Have you ever felt that compared with "everyone else" around you, your own circumstances are the worst? Do you have thoughts like "all my mates have achieved this, done that, have this or have that" and I haven't? I'm now exploring this idea of measuring myself with another person's yard stick. Where does it come from? Is it parents, peer pressure, the society as a whole or just my own unrealistic expectations?

It's probably a mixture of all four. On one hand, it drives me to want to achieve more and more (sort of like healthy competition) to ensure that I can boast too, but on the other hand, it makes me think "What's the point? That person just had better opportunities than I have". Like when you hear of your classmate in university who is now a millionaire, or your friend from high school now running her own fashion empire. You are happy for them of course, but you also compare yourself and you end up feeling very small.

I think it starts when we still are young. You are put in a classroom with 15 or so other 3-year olds. There you are expected to all be at the same level, grow at the same speed and learn at the same pace. If for any reason you don't keep up with the rest of the class, then there's a problem with you. This pattern continues throughout life. You want the latest toys because "everybody has one". You want to wear a certain item of clothing because "that's what all the other kids are wearing". You want to feel like you are similar to everyone. You find yourself constantly looking around and checking to see if you are ahead or behind of your peers. And parents also keep telling you about their own friends' children who are doing much better than you.

Then you grow up and suddenly you realise that some things are outside your control. Your career is progressing very slowly meanwhile your mates have soared far ahead. Or your mates are getting engaged, married, and having babies while you are still single. Or your friend has just bought a new house, while you are still renting or living at home. It all adds up to a perfect recipe for frustration.

But why do we compare? Are we all given the same opportunities? Did God give us the same talents? Do we have the same circumstances? Do we all have the same goals? Do we have the same experiences or backgrounds? No, no, no and no. We don't even have the same genes!

So I've decided, from now on, I'm not going to compare myself with anyone else. I am me. I am unique. We all have our time and purpose to fulfil on earth. My time and purpose is not dependent on other people. Only God is in full control. And only God will I give the ability to push me forward.


Image credit: plmtwine.com

Guest Post: Book Writing Strategies by Andrea Constantine

Can a book really be easy? Three So-Easy Strategies – They’re Just Silly.


by Andrea Constantine

It’s hard to believe just a year ago I didn’t even have a book in the pipeline. At the time, it was just some pipe-dream. Little did I know that in less than twelve months I’d soon have two books on the market. It seems ironic since I had struggled for years to even commit to an idea for a book, but now the ideas are everywhere.

Why was my experience so easy? What was different or was I just plain lucky? In reality it was none of those excuses that even I’d love to believe. If I happen to come across a page of luck, I’d surely share my secret formula, but it isn’t about luck at all.

Over the course of the year, there have been three-oh-so-easy strategies that supported this stellar growth. Besides only sleeping on Sundays, and cloning myself, - teasing - these are the three things that I know can help bring your book to life too!

Drumroll p-uh-lease!?!

Collaboration. First, I didn’t go at it alone. Lone-ranger out – team player in! My book and business partner Lisa Shultz is my main collaborator; however, in our first book we had 47 other lovely ladies submit their chapters to us. Which made the writing process a whole-heck-of-a-lot easier. Imagine a book with your name on it and you just have to write a few chapters!? When I went to take my first stab at writing a book, I failed, I barely got started, and the whole-darn process seemed overwhelming as all get out. I quit. Here’s where luck or serendipity did come in, Lisa asked me to join her on her book project, and I said yes! Suddenly, I saw the light. If you want to do something big in your life, whether write a book or become president, you are not going to get their alone.

Goals. I know, this sounds elementary. But they work. Goals, deadlines, and a fire under your-you-know-what are seriously the key to just getting that book written and out into the world. Trying to write a book without some looming deadline means that your book may, just may, be ready for print in 2025. Clearly define your goals and figure it out from there. When Lisa and I partnered at the end of 2009, we picked late August for our launch date. We then worked backwards and timed out every step in between. It kept us on schedule and it kept the process moving along. We always knew where we had to be and when we had to be there by. Goals, however over-emphasized in our world, are a shortcut to accomplishment.

Accountability. If no one knows you are writing a book, or if you’ve locked up your work in a vault fearful of putting it out into the world – it’s never going to get out there. Accountability to others is one of the fastest ways to get your book done and out to market. Lisa and I checked in with each other so frequently during the writing and compilation of our books, that we never missed a beat. How are you on this? Where are you on that? How’s this coming along? What can I do to help you? Flailing along as a solo-aspiring-author is difficult, challenging, and lonely-as-the corner ice cream store in a February snowstorm. Don’t do it, do not, under any circumstances attempt to go at it alone. If you are writing a book as the sole author, it doesn’t mean that you can’t have an accountability partner, coach, friend, or mentor. Team up and you will find a pot of gold at the end of that rainbow, filled with inspiration, encouragement, and motivation.

So really, as you can see – writing and getting two books complete in one year isn’t all that hard if you abide by these oh-so-easy-strategies. Don’t wait to get your book done. Get your book done this year!

And if you are ready to take the leap and write your book this year, then check out Andrea Costantine and Lisa Shultz’s latest book… www.bringyourbooktolifethisyear.com – Grab your copy today and receive two months accountability and writing support in their monthly mentoring group and other bonuses valued at $150.

On Life: Achilles' Heel

It's been a busy time for me in the last two months. Apart from writing, I've had my family coming over, been taking driving lessons, and generally moving into a new phase of my life. I've also been catching up on my reading, as I've got so many books on my to-read list, it's unbelievable. But I still can't stop myself from buying more! In the last month, I've read The Book Thief by Markus Zusak (this was quite a strange book, very different from what I would usually pick up, but it was a very good read nonetheless), The Boy Next Door by Irene Sabatini (I quite enjoyed reading this love story woven around the politics of Zimbabwe), and  Love at Dawn by Lara Daniels (a tale of love, forgiveness and redemption which I thoroughly enjoyed reading) and I'm looking forward to a couple more before the end of the year.

Ever since I saw the movie Troy, I've been fascinated with the main characters in the story, especially Achilles. He was the great hero of the Trojan War and apparently when he was a baby his mother dipped him into a river which made him invincible except for his heel. According to Greek mythology, Achilles grew to become a great warrior and no one could stop him until Paris, a prince of Troy managed to shoot an arrow into his heel. Thus the phrase "Achilles heel" came to mean a weakness or flaw that can lead to a person's downfall in spite of his overall strength. 

This story makes me think that we all have a weakness that can potentially lead to our downfall if we don't deal with it. I can think of many great men who have been destroyed by their lack of self-control when it comes to women. Some people have ended up in prison because of their greed for money. Some people have committed atrocious acts because of anger. And the list goes on. It may seem like it's not a big deal, and just overlook a small flaw in ourselves, but we do need to be careful. I know that I have my weaknesses too, and I have to constantly ask God for grace to overcome them. It can be all too easy to let one thing get out of hand, until we lose control and succumb to negative desires.

If you are struggling with some temptations or something that goes against your principles, please don't ignore it or hope it would go away by itself. You have to take steps to make sure you don't fall. For example, if you know your married boss at work is showing inappropriate interest in you, it would certainly not be wise to go on a dinner date with him. Do what you can to remove yourself from such sticky situations! One little slip of judgement could be all it takes, and before you know it, you are involved in an affair.

Oh well, that's enough sermonising for now, lol.  Check out some of my new stories and flash fiction before you leave! Thanks for visiting!

FG

Flash Fiction - Tearing Me Apart

The real father of my children stared back at me. Somehow, I found the strength to utter the words.
'You have to leave,' I said. 'I am falling in love with you and it’s tearing me apart.'
A pained look crossed his face. He let go of my hand and swallowed hard.
'I understand. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.'
He went over to the cot where the twins were, fast asleep. He kissed them both and looked at me again.
'Take good care of them. And give my regards to your husband.' Then he stepped out of the room and closed the door.

I felt my heart break.

When William had found out he was infertile, it was my idea for us to use a donor to get me pregnant. What I hadn’t bargained for was developing feelings for Gavin. He was just supposed to be a sperm donor and nothing more. But I found myself being drawn to him over time. And now the joy of having our babies was mixed with the pain of a marriage being shaken to its very foundation.

A single tear traced its way down my left cheek.

(FG)

Article - University of Life

Sometime ago I pondered about this modern world of ours. Something is really wrong. There is a break down of society as a whole. We read of shootings and stabbings daily in the newspapers. We hear of gangs of youths carrying knives and guns to defend themselves with. We hear of marriages breaking up everyday - divorce rates are soaring and people are choosing not to get married anyway. We hear that stress at work is a major killer and cause of many serious diseases. We see the picture of the ideal family unit broken almost beyond repair. We see people sacrificing everything in the pursuit of happiness that just seems to elude them. Why is it so? I think it is mostly because we have placed the emphasis on the wrong things.

From the moment we are born, we are thrust into a society that places so much importance in education and defines us by success in our careers. How? We'll take the life of this typical child. From the day he is born, his parents bought him the best 'educational toys' that aim to give him a headstart in learning skills. His parents do all they can to enroll him in the best nursery school where he is to learn basic skills in speech, reading and writing. After that, he goes on to primary school where he is taught a wide range of subjects to give him a knowledge base that will be useful in future. Fast forward to three years of secondary school and then he is expected to make certain choices in his subjects that will start to define his future career. By the time he is finished with secondary school, success means achieving a place at university to study a degree. This degree will be his ticket to a life-long career. He may need to continually update his qualifications for example, getting a Masters qualification, taking some examinations etc. Success is measured by his job and how much he earns. Assuming he finished education at 24, he spends the next 40-odd years of his life working 9 - 5, Monday to Friday to earn a living. If the UK government have their way, he would be working until he is in his 70s before he can retire and claim a pension. But is that all?

Now I think education is a good thing. I think every child on this planet should be given an equal chance to succeed with a certain level of education. But I find it worrying that we place so much importance on just that - education and career. Is there not more to life than acquiring a degree? Would having a brilliant career make everyone's life fulfilled?

I read something in 'My Daily Bread' a while back. A survey was conducted about what people would want to reflect on in their final moments on this earth. What would they look back on and count as achievements? Strings of degrees? An impressive CV? Hefty bank accounts? List of awards and certificates? No. The main response people gave was they they would want their loved ones around them when they were on their death-bed. Furthermore, the biggest regret expressed wasn't "I wish I had spent more time at work". It was "I wish I had spent more time with my family". Family and loved ones always took priority over education and achievements.

Now if this is true, how come we still have this dysfunctional world? How come we spend the vast majority of our lives either in education or working endlessly pursuing material wealth? How come you can go to university to study virtually any subject in academics or research but there is no university that teaches us about the real-life challenges we face? You can study to become a Financial Analyst but who teaches you how to cope with the grief of losing of a loved one? You can study to become a doctor but where do you study to become a good husband or wife? I can graduate with a Bcs in Mathematics but where can I get a degree in Good Parenting Skills? Those are the things that really challenge us as individuals and no amount of education can help.

If I could change the world, I would shake up the current set-up. I would not be happy in a world where the majority of hours in the week,  is all but committed to working, working, working. A world where the main driving force is money, money, money. When do we have time to actually live? When do we have time to grow and learn to become better people? Why won't we have a society that is crumbling?

On Life: Faith vs Common Sense

"Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to." ~ George Seaton

For a while I've been pondering on faith, and its implications for the way I live my life every day. Sometimes when I'm at a crossroads and I need to make a decision, I often have a dilemma. Should I go with common sense or should I walk by faith? Do I go with my instincts? Should I make a list of pros and cons and use pure common sense to make a decision? Should I weigh all the options and go with the most "logical" conclusion? Should the way forward be the most "reasonable" one?

However, as a Christian who has decided to make God the CEO of my life, I've sometimes had to step back and wait for a different direction. The bible says: "Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen". The bible also says "Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding."

There are many examples of God asking His people in the bible to make decisions that totally make no sense. God called Abraham to leave all that he knew, his father's house and go to a strange land. God told Noah to build an ark when there was no sea or river around him. God told Gideon to go to war with only 300 men when they were facing an enemy army of over 100,000 soldiers. Each time, it required true faith to for each of these people to override their common sense and obey God.

Still, it can be really scary when common sense clashes with what you believe God is telling you to do. If God says: quit your job and become a full-time missionary in some remote village, what immediately comes to mind? Questions and doubts of course. Like: how will I survive without a regular income? What about my career? Will I be safe there without my family and friends around me? Etc.

Even the strongest amongst us wrestles with doubt sometimes. It's normal, it's natural, it's part of being human. But from my little experience, I'll say that in the end, common sense has its place but faith triumphs over it. As long as your faith is in God and what He has called you to do, you cannot go wrong.

• Common sense relies on your own limited abilities. Faith relies on God's unlimited ability.
• Common sense stops when things get rough. Faith keeps going when common sense is exhausted.
• Common sense says you should play it safe. Faith challenges us to step beyond our comfort zone
• Faith says one failure does not mean the end. Common sense says you should give up if it doesn't work the first time.
• Common sense limits you to only what you know. Faith empowers you to stretch your imagination.

Thanks for reading!

FG

Short Story - When We Talk About Love

I picked up my jacket and stormed out of the restaurant after ten minutes. Tom got up and ran after me. The waiters and other diners looked at us strangely but I did not even give them a backward glance.
“So where are you going?” Tom asked as he caught up with me. “All the other restaurants along this road are fully booked”

“I know you wanted to make Valentine’s Day special” I replied, pausing to catch my breath. “But to me, love is more than this - showing up when it suits you and making excuses.”

“Linda, I think you are over-reacting”.

“I’m not!” I shouted, drawing curious looks from passers-by and a man selling flowers at the stall on the corner.

“Please calm down”, Tom said. “I know you are upset but please….

“Look at this Tom” I cut in angrily. “You ignored my calls last weekend when I needed you, but then you turn up at my office this evening with presents and a dinner reservation for two. What am I supposed to think?”

Tom sighed and ran his hand through his hair.

I had to admit, he looked good this evening. He was coming from the office and he looked sharp in his suit. When he showed up at my office and told me where he was taking me for dinner, I was secretly impressed with his choice of venue for the dinner reservation. I had been thinking of trying the same restaurant for a long time but I was holding out for a special occasion. It had looked particularly warm and inviting from the outside this evening. The staff had replaced the normal bright lights with soft glow lights and placed red roses on the tables. The tables had been rearranged specially to create little cocoons for lovebirds dining out tonight. In all, it looked like an environment where love would blossom and it would have been really special if Tom had not upset me last weekend.

“I’m sorry Linda” Tom sighed. “But can we go back to talk inside? It’s cold out here”

I paused for a few seconds, searching his face to read his emotions.

“Okay” I finally relented. I let him take my hand and lead me back into the restaurant. The waiter at the door raised his eyebrows when he saw us coming back in. Tom sheepishly asked if we could have our table back.

“Of course sir,” he replied, beckoning us to follow him. “This way please.”

We got back to our table and sat down again. The waiter set the menus before us and took our drinks order. Tom ordered his drink and an expensive bottle of wine for later. But I was in no mood for anything fancy, so I just ordered mineral water. I faced Tom squarely and started speaking as soon as the waiter left to get our drinks.

“Everything was going fine until last month” I accused. “You seemed to go cold; you cancelled two dates and started making excuses when I tried to see you”

“Linda, I told you that the past month has been quite hectic. Between moving to my new place and getting promoted at work, I have been really busy”.

I raised one eyebrow. “Busy? You have always been busy since I met you, that is not a good excuse for ignoring me last week and the weekend before that”

Tom and I had been dating for just over a year. Even though we really liked each other from our first meeting, our relationship had gotten off to a rocky start. I had been sceptical about starting a relationship with him at first. While we were still getting to know each other, I found out he had a very clingy ex-girlfriend. Her name was Kerry and she did not want to admit that her relationship with Tom was over and he was now seeing someone else. In my opinion Tom had been rather too easy on her, still taking her calls many weeks later and gently trying to persuade her to let go of their relationship. I guess, in his defence he couldn’t help being the perfect gentleman. Even though I thought it would have made things easier if he had been firmer with her. Eventually three months into our relationship, she got the hint and drifted away quietly.
Then I got to know she resurfaced last month. And that was about the same time Tom started acting suspiciously. I wanted to trust Tom and believe that everything was alright between us. But the last time I visited him at home, I found something that worried me. At first I thought it didn’t matter, but I decided to confront him now. I figured out that if he confirmed my suspicions, then I would break it off with him and move on with my life. I have had to deal with worse situations than a break-up on Valentine’s Day.

“Everything will be okay soon you’ll see” Tom was saying. I thought he sounded nervous.

“You have become very secretive.” I said. “I can’t believe you bought a new place without telling me.”

“Linda you know I explained that I didn’t want to tell you about the house initially, in case the sale didn’t go through”

“Yes, but the last time I was at your old place, I asked you if you were moving soon, and you said no”

“At the time I wasn’t so sure. You know I had just been promoted at work, I was working longer hours and I still had a lot of loose ends to tie up” Tom said pleading with his eyes.

I decided to take a softer line with him, but I still had to get to the bottom of the issue bugging me.

“I understand that, but we have always agreed to let each other know what’s going on in our lives no matter how busy we are. How can we have a good relationship if we don’t communicate?”

Just then the waiter brought the drinks and asked us if we were ready to order. Tom suggested that we should go for the Valentines Day special set menu and I nodded my agreement. The waiter left and Tom reached across the table to take my hand.

“Linda, I love you and I really want our relationship to work out” he said softly.

“When you talk about love, what do you mean? Open discussions or secrets?”

“I…well...alright, open discussions”

“And love includes faithfulness doesn’t it?”

“Yes it does”

“Then what about her?” I countered.

“Her… who?” he said, seeming confused.

“Kerry” I finally said.

He took a deep breath. “Linda, she is out of our lives for good.”

“When was the last time you heard from her”

“Three weeks ago”

I had to ask. “Did she call you?”

“Yes she did, and she called from a number I didn’t recognise. If I had known it was her, I wouldn’t have answered the call”

I shook my head. It was like my fears were being confirmed.

“Believe me Linda. Kerry was just calling me to say she was moving to Australia and nothing more”.

That was a surprise. “She said that? So she’s moving half-way across the world?”

“Yes, she has a new job and a new boyfriend. She actually sounded very happy to tell me that”

I heaved an inward sigh of relief but this wasn’t over yet.

“Okay, one more thing” I said. “What about the jewellery?”

The look on Tom’s face said it all.

“How did you know about that?” he choked.

“I found the receipt” I said calmly. “Now just go ahead and explain that too”

“Excuse me for a minute” Tom scrambled from his chair and hurried off towards the bar.
I saw him talking to the bartender, and pointing at our table. I looked away because even though I had imagined this, I couldn’t have imagined how it felt to be betrayed by Tom. I had trusted him too much, I thought to myself. I decided to leave the restaurant before I burst into tears.

Just as I got up, Tom came back and held my hand.

“I’ve got something for you,” he said reaching for his pocket. “I was going to wait till later, but I should do it now”

He paused and said, ”Linda, will you marry me?”